#when i couldnt scroll to the next page...

[1-800-i-ship-it]

omg i just finished orv im going insane im im i can finally look at that doc of things i saved for after i finished orv and can look at spoilers...i can finally unblock that orv spoiler tag...im so normal about orv

[burreauxsss]

betrayed.. again

background: y/n a wag for the chiefs who is dating travis kelce of 3 years finds out he cheated on her. she assures herself that she'd never watch the nfl nor date another nfl player, until a convincing quarterback hits her dms.

(all pics from pinterest, all rights reserved)

synopsis: y/n gets "cheated on", small time jump to present day.

word count: 571

notes: kept this part short, enjoy.

warning: this is a au aka alternative universe series, depictions of cheating , duex instigating as usual

(group chat in joes pov, y/n was removed from the gc)

Opening social media that one fateful monday morning was something you shouldve never done. Immediately notifications pop up about a video of Joe and a model at a gathering sitting next to eachother. But in the video, the model gets up and sits on his lap.

Immediately you felt nauseous, what coursed him to do this to you. Why did he do this to his pregnant girlfriend. And the fact that she was embracing the fact she was a whore on her tiktok page by sneak dissing you was your last straw.

Getting out of bed, you slip on your slippers and stomp downstairs in a robe. Walking into the kitchen where Joe's sitting at the counter scrolling on his phone. What may seem like a normal day to him, you were seeing red. Snatching the phone out of his hand and holding it tight so he couldnt take it back.

"What the hell y/n." his deep voice echoes through the kitchen as he tries to get his phone back but your hand never budges from letting the electronic go. The betrayal clearly showing on your face as you unlock his phone.

"How long have you been hiding this from me?" The pain in your voice, the teary eyes that made his heart get even colder. He knows he messed up so he treads lightly

"Y/n. I-I am so sorry. It was when we first started dating."

"I already have trust issues, you dont know how bad he hurt me!" you scream straight at Joe. Throwing his phone back at him and running upstairs as fast as you can. Knowing you have a trip planned to the Keys, remembering that he wont be able to talk to you for a bit in person.

And even a few hours later while on flight with your friends privately you try to keep your face straight, off social media to delay your emotions taking over. How could Joe do that to you? This was a place where'd you been before awhile back with Travis.

duexmoi

❤️ 371,438 💬 23,900

Liked by: tmz traviskelce e!news and others

duexmoi: y/n y/ln spotted in key west alone! could this mean that her and joe are over?

username_8: time for the breakup photoshoot y/n!

username_9: yall stalking her is wild

username_10: travis enjoying the downfall.. okay

username_11: shes actually pretty.

*load more comments*

yn.handle 📍 key west, florida

❤️ 122,471 💬 0

Liked by: bellahadid kimkardashian chanel and others

yn.handle: 🏖️ dump

*comments turned off*

Returning back home was stressful, almost missing your flight due to one of your friends not waking up early and people in your way. But when you returned back to the house Joe was on the couch in the living room, shirtless with his hair wet fresh out of the shower.

He looked at you slightly knowing this look made you go insane although the situation you necessarily didnt cover before leaving wasnt ideal. So as you sit down he turns off the TV and turns his attention towards you.

"Y/N."

"I know this isnt what you want but I truely apologize, we were talking when that incident happened and it just now made the media." Joe says with bags underneath his eyes as he bites his lip as a anxiety reliever.

The relief came to you, knowing you were in the wrong for accusing him for doing it while dating brought guilt of the things you said. He wasnt yours when it happened, only the talking stage that you were both in at the time.

Joe looked down at the rug, tearing up and closed his eyes thinking you may not forgive him until he felt your chest and scent as you hugged him. Knowing he'd never get forgiven for something like this he broke down into tears, some cruel rumor almost messed up what you had between him.

notes: it was almost done so i finished it in my drafts.. 2 uploads in one day now goodnight! also, do yall think joe shouldve got taken back by y/n?

[rafeslvbug]

penpal!rafe finding a penpal…

laying on his bed, staring at the ceiling as the effects of his coke had finally begun to wear off, rafe felt the creeping emptiness burrow it’s way back into the hole in his chest.

empty and alone.

again.

carvings in the ceiling plaster, something dumb rose must’ve picked out when she refurbished the house, two people dancing, again, and again. happier than he was. two people who had each other, and who did he have?

topper had run from the party early to seek out sarah, trying his luck with a girl who had no interest in him. the girls he had spent the night crowded by were nothing more than distractions, and to them, he was nothing more than eye candy, something they’d wear to school like their new handbag, and he’d just let them. he’d pay for their fancy shit, and let them drag him around, their annoying whines of ��rafeyy, get me this?” drawling off their tongues in a way that made him want to rip his ears off.

turning his head to the side, deflated and reaching a hand out to drag his computer closer to him across the blankets, rafe heaved a sigh. lazy fingers flicking the screen open, illuminating his dark room.

between tweets of the party he just left, and drunken photos, he stumbled across one from this spoilt girl, some messy thing she fumbled to type in her inebriation : ‘d’you guys ever see thsi fucin penpal shit? losers needin frend sonline. couldnt ve me’

rafe squints at the mismatched letters, making sense of the tweet, eyes wandering down to the link she attached, a post intended to ridicule this act of exchanging letters. wanting a laugh, his finger drifts over the keypad to open the link, watching the little ring spin in circles until some website loaded.

FIND A PENPAL!

it read, and he chuckled at nothing at all, the enthusiasm of people determined to find a faceless thing to talk to. “fuck knows what kind of creeps you can get on this shit..” he mumbles, scrolling through the endless profiles after he reluctantly made an account just to see them. he named himself cam, not wanting anyone to find him on this website and become the next topic of mockery, his about me was blank, not risking any attention being brought his way, and partially not bothered to put in so much effort.

martin: 27 years old, australian, would love to hear about different cultures and experiences, considering a big move.

helena: 19, looking to move to england from spain, wants a penpal to learn the language

then..one that caught his eye, a faceless profile, picture of a gingham dress and a ridiculously long ‘about me’ page.

cali: hi! my name’s cali, i would tell you what it’s short for but maybe that’s something you should get to know if you were my penpal! not from anywhere special, just a really boring place, with equally boring people. i’m 19, and think it’d be fun to get to know someone with actual interests - other than the people at my school i see on the daily. would love to talk, and please nothing if you’re way older!

rafe smiles, cali was the type of crap the drunk girl was making fun of, over explaining her life and babbling about how desperate she is to have friends.

then again, she wasn’t.

it struck him in a way he wasn’t familiar with, how she wasn’t alone, necessarily. she just felt bored, felt like other people were being pretentious, and in the worst way he felt he could relate.

it must’ve been that that possessed him to delve further into her profile, the naivety and open mindedness, clumsy like a five year old child willing to trust anyone.

endearing, cute, stupid.

staring at the name, the profile of some dumb, cutesy dress, and the bubbly introduction like he couldn’t bring himself to depart from it. he couldn’t close the laptop, abandon the site, leave some stupid comment on the tweet of that drunk girl as he usually would.

he couldn’t.

her mailbox point was close, daringly close as he delved further into her details, the ones she willingly spread. maybe a ten minute drive from him. he couldn’t just close the tab.

what could he do?

his fingers moved on automation, carefully sliding the mouse over the screen to the button at the bottom of her page :

CHOOSE THIS PENPAL?

click!

notes : ‘cali’ is not her real name! her real name is your name! it’s just a pen name to keep her identity hidden from those who are local (like rafe & the same way he calls himself cam)

taglist: @starkeyjoseph @rafesbabygirlx @slut-4-rafey @lanaslushworld @littlelamy @rain-likes-purple @sunny1616 @csturnioloswifey @silkylovey @mak1777

[wolfertinger]

"I don't mean to add more mental strain but I just discovered this blog and I'm both shocked and a little overwhelmed by what I see.

For context, I follow wis on Tumblr, and I follow Salem on Bluesky (and I think Tumblr too iirc?)

I don't check either platform frequently so most of what happens with people I follow can end up flying under my radar, but I discover this here and a Bluesky that seems to suggest both are bad? And I want to understand better what's happening.

So, what happened? I don't need a super in-depth thing, just an overview is good enough for me, and obviously you don't need to give me anything, but scrolling through this blog there's a lot here, and I want to have some basic info to work with if that's not too much to ask."

to give as much, of a tl:dr as possible. i will copypaste from anothers detailing, of what has gone down:

"the baseline of it is that sawyer/razzicetea and salem dated and broke up some time ago, mainly based on salems behavior and especially regarding his attitudes toward a shared ex. (torin/maewiing, that had groomed several minors on discord as well as other abusive actions) salem sheltered this ex despite knowing fully of their actions, and claimed a traumabond made it hard for him to fully disavow torin. he also claimed they sexually pressured him into acts such as requesting shotacon art of his fursona. this was despite the fact he continued to retweet their art on his page and freely interacted with/followed them privately, where he thought he wouldn't get caught. this has been going on since 2022 and he was caught interacting with them as recent as 2024 mind you.

note: salem understands 100% that torin is an abuser, a groomer, and a liar. he still claims sawyer to be "abusive" for discouraging him from interacting with them.

ADDITION 3/1/25: torin is a kiwifarms user as well. torin speaks spanish, and alongside the "sparklef*ggot" name, and the info given. i have 100% reason to believe, this is her, misgendering and deadnaming salem. TO THIS DAY wis and salem, defend torin. despite her being a nsfw feral/loli artist. an irl child groomer. an abuser. a kiwifarms user. and a transphobe.

next: lilya. lilya was another person in salem/wis/etc's group. this is wis' story regarding lilya.

this is sawyer's.

note: sawyer provided screenshots, wis did not. wis is actively twisting the truth in order to make herself, salem, and lilya seem better against sawyer, despite the fact lilya showcases repeatedly manipulative and abusive behaviors toward both salem and sawyer, such as deadnaming salem, going on the "transfem harassment website" kiwifarms (wis' words), and purposely betraying sawyer for her own amusement.

lastly: mari. mari is a woman who dated sawyer for some time. in this relationship, mari was repeatedly physically, psychologically , and sexually abusive. she had in the past hit sawyer, screamed slurs at them, manipulated them emotionally into things like sex, and during sex, would often not stop when asked or would go rough enough to make sawyer bleed and even tear once. sawyer recalls one time while meeting irl, mari heavily pressured them into taking edibles. after taking these they greened out and fell asleep. upon waking up mari had penetrated sawyer nonconsentually. mari claims to have been "so blackout high she couldnt remember" and stated she "found it odd sawyer could remember everything". it makes sense to me an abuser would memoryhole something awful they did while their victim is forced to struggle with thinking about if this memory could be true or false. ill try to let the pictures speak for themselves.

this is what i can do for rn. sorry its gonna be a long post but i want to be as respectful to sawyer and their privacy as possible as well as putting the full story out there, even wis' side. it helps to see her words against sawyer's screenshots though."

[angelliicc]

signal

“i send you a sign, send you a signal

but it doesn't work at all”

a/n: hey guys im back again. enjoy because this is based off of a real life story to me :)

warnings: none

masterlist

| your team jumped for joy, forming a circle. “WE’RE GOING TO CHAMPIONSHIPS!!” you all exclaimed. the playoffs were a very close game, your team winning by a point yesterday. tears of joy filled the gym when you all realized you were going to the finals game.

“wanna watch the next game to see who we’re playing tomorrow?” coach asked.

“sure.” your team replied. you climbed up the bleachers sitting in the middle. you sat next to your friend, just as about it was tip off. you had no idea which schools they were. they were just yellow vs. black to you. the first half was quite boring, so you scrolled on your phone. halftime ended and it was the start of the 3rd quarter.

black was in possession of the ball until a girl from the yellow team stole it and made a wide open layup. woah. you thought to yourself. shes good. really good.

you couldnt take her eyes off of her. the way she played, her defense, her handles, her height, everything. you were admiring her from afar. you can finally see the back of her jersey. 14, williams.

you received a pamphlet of all the schools and players who were eligible to playoffs. you grabbed yours and flipped the pages quickly, looking for a williams.

“#14, ellie williams, point guard.” ellie huh? you thought to yourself.

the game eventually ended, with ellie and her school winning. meaning you were playing her tomorrow evening.

“im so scared, nervous, and excited.” you tell dina at school.

“im sure you guys will be fine! you have an undefeated season!” dina replied.

“i have a feeling we might lose. they’re really good and tall.” you said

“im sure everything will be fine, good luck tonight tho!” dina spoke

“thanks, i need it.” you joked back.

school ended at 3, the game was at 7. you had to get ready quickly since the play you were playing at wasn’t close. you brought your gym bag and water bottle and jumped into the car.

you were the first one there, with tons of emotions flowing through your body. you had a mental breakdown yesterday since you didn’t play to your expectations, which resulted into your mom scolding you. you wanted to make sure you played your best today.

more and more people arrived, parents, athletes, coaches, anyone. the gym was divided, half being in pink to support you and the others being in yellow to support your opponents.

tip off was in 5 minutes, you weren’t a starter, but you understood. your emotions were trying to get the best of you, but you tried to stop it. your coach gave you and your teammates some advice and where everyone should go, then the buzzer rang.

“on the court lets go!” the ref shouted. you sat down on the bench, watch the ball fly up in the air, then one of your teammates swinging it to your team.

“is ellie starting?” you thought to yourself. you didn’t see her on the court, but found her on the bench, watching eagerly just like you were.

2nd quarter had arrived, 15-24. you were losing. “you, go.” the co-coach told you. you got up, making sure your shoes had grip and ran on the court. you saw ellie was also playing. a foul got called against your team, so an opponent got 2 free throws. you were waiting on the 1st one.

“what are you doing? get ready!” coach scolded. when the opposing team got the rebound, coach called a timeout.

“you, take a charge on #14 if you can. shes too tall and drives fast.” coach ordered

“but who will the foul get called against?” you questioned.

“she will, shes in foul trouble.”

but before he can even explain more, reg blew the whistle, ordering everyone to get on the court. her team now had the ball. you tried your best to take a charge, but chickened out. coach subed you out. that was the only time you played.

it was a close game, but the other team started to give out towards the 4th quarter. your team took advantage of that. less than a minute left. shot clock. 52-48. your team had possession of the ball. there was 6 seconds left. ball up in the air, and it was a good. a 3 pointer made with 6 seconds left.

your team were champions. an undefeated record, the first in your schools history. you and your team gather outside to do an “undefeated” chant. all of a sudden, you see ellie in tears. you walk up to her, trying your best to comfort her. “hey, good game out there. you played good.” you said, attempting to cheer her up. all she could do was nod.

a few days later, you couldn’t stop thinking about ellie. “why can’t i get her out of my head?” you asked yourself. its like she owned your mind, and she was the only thing in it. you had no choice but to find her online, somehow.

you figured out the schools name, and decided to check the following list on it on instagram, when you see her username with a profile picture that looks exactly like her. “oh shit, its ellie. should i follow?” you ask yourself “you know what. fuck it.”

you pressed that blue follow button. next moment, your phone buzzed. she followed you back. it was like you were on cloud 9.

you went through her stories, seeing that she plays volleyball. you decided to dm her saying who you were, and that you played against her.

r: “hey, are you one of the players from the championship game?”

e: “yes, are you one of our opponents?”

r: “yup, i just wanted to say like your really fucking good i saw your semi-final game on sunday you killed it.”

e: “thank you so much omg you are rlly good too. i saw you guys play at the finals game. you are rlly good.”

r: “thank you, how long have you been playing?”

e: “7 years, wbu?”

r: “technically 2, i player when i was younger and i play now. i played volleyball for the first time this year, it was interesting.”

e: “vb is amazing. why, what happened?”

you then told her the unnecessary drama that happened at that time. it was definitely an experience.

r: “i wanna join club vb but its so expensive”

e: “fr like thousands of dollars to hit a ball over a net?”

r: “there’s a club near my city, but they want $6k”

e: “jesus, for hitting balls?”

r: “exactly! i can do it for free at my house”

you both then continued to talk about club volleyball, until you mentioned her volleyball videos. god she was amazing, you can see her going pro one day. she complimented you for your kind gesture. you both talked about how you can go against each other in the future again.

the next couple of days, you were contemplating weather or not to try out for club vb, so you texted ellie about it.

r: “hey ellie, i kinda wanna try out for volleyball. do you have any tips or what to expect?”

e: “theres gonna be passing, hitting, and serving. just keep practicing those.”

the conversation continued until it was getting late, and you both stopped responding to each other.

over the summer, you kept throwing hints to her how you liked her. you were head over heels for her, but you didn’t know if she liked you. you went complete stalker mode, looking at her reposts. you put songs on your story that reminded you of her. you replied to her stories and her notes, but she just didn’t get it.

over time, you made it to her close friends list. you felt like you won the lottery. you told dina and jesse about this crush, but they weren’t supportive.

“you can do better.” jesse commented

“first of all, what the fuck? and second, shes cute and a good baller.” you replied.

“i don’t think she likes you, sorry.” dina said. “shes friendzoning you. you’re the one always texting her first, replying to her, etc. i think you need to stop.”

“and what if i don’t?” you questioned.

“you’re gonna get your hopes up, all for nothing. don’t let her break your heart.” jesse added.

from then on, the signals you sent her died down. you didn’t text her as often as you did. you replied to her stories only rarely. you were forced to fall out of love.

i give you a glance and keep throwing hints

but you don’t understand

[where-does-the-heart-lie]

GOD chapter 59 was SO GOOD n i have a lot to say so sending an ask instead of leaving it on the post.

i /love/ when you make things hyper detailed, because your shading techniques are so much fun to sit n stare at and soak in for a while. that being said, the coloring of the wine spilling is what does it for me this time. it still would have been really cool in bw, but not as cool as seeing all the shades of red over the dark blue bg. you did the glass really well too!! I don't think there's a noticeable difference between the wine color inside and outside the glass which is fine bc it's clear, so it RLY makes me appreciate the lighting you have around the glass rim to show the edge in contrast. that tiny little detail makes the image for me. stellar work. i love it

also i do wanna throw in appreciation for the handwritten serif. super well done at first glance it did look like you'd jus typed it out. idk what texture you have on the brush you use for words but it's rly nice to look at up close.

i think the color kinda tipped me off but i waffled bc i couldn't remember if either of his parents spoke in serif font and was a bit daunted to dig thru 50+ chapters to confirm who it was if it didn't turn out to be them. i'm glad i looked at your tags tho haha saved me the trouble. what a way to end the act too!! i read this one on my phone and was scrolling thru the images at full size and after four or so i kept expecting it to cut off. it was a very pleasant surprise to have it keep going, worth the wait to have a longer chapter :)

maybe it jus wasn't meant to be a la sabo getting the letter from sally. it might have to be stelly after all tho there are things that come before then. what a bad time to have one or both of his parents speak to him for the first time that night. oof can't wait for the next act lets goooo

Oh wowww what a beautifully long review!

Thanks so much im glad you like how it turned out, i’m really happy with it, too! Ive never drawn fluids like this before, but i really needed this page to have that extra kick because it was such a short one.

Because i couldnt figure out how to make this moment look slow mo with multiple different panels on one page, I really wanted to make a piece that is like,, frozen in time instead.

A page like this, you can keep on it as long as you’d like. You can make it as slow mo as you want it to be.

The serif lettering is that of outlook’s!

I dont know if you can see the difference between this and my usual handwriting, but it’s supposed to look taller. Higher up. Neater. Cleaner. (Still my handwriting though so like so actually neat or clean, but you know like,,, in comparison to the norm.)

His dad only talks in one scene, and his mother has never said anything yet, so i dont blame you if you couldnt find it. In my. Large repertoire of chapters ive accumulated.

I definitely felt the same about the pages when drawing them. But probably the opposite feeling lol. Mine was more like “ugh i forgot theres so many. How many more of these do I have to get through??? How did i do this the first act ending with 11 pages???”

Im so glad you guys are on the edge of your seats with the letter :)

Thanks for the ask!

[yin-shimo]

Collective (and final) Post

- because I'll be deleting the previous posts and hoping this singular one is good enough for everyone.

Let's get the biggest issue out of the way,

Yes, I am a proshipper and no i don't care how you feel about it. As always, please feel free to block me now and not bother to read the rest, its the reason i was open about being one in the first place.

I never cared i was banned from yoonie's server. i never talked in it and i wasn't there to make friends. I was in there solely to see if they said anything about me and yeah they did. You can go crazy and call me a stalker for that too, I get it. What they said is irrelevant (such as my cc, i don't know why its made out to seem like im upset abt that..) to why im upset, i just disliked them viewing my account like stalkers even tho none followed or liked me. Thats it. I would have never called out names etc if yoonnie hadnt vague posted me.

secondly, for all the csa and sa mentions and me supposedly posting weird ships or whatever. Please, please actually scroll through my account and show me where i have EVER talked about any ships (aside from wx), posted images abt the topic, or anything similar.

while youre at it, please show me where it was that i failed to tag such 'problematic' nsfw posts. you do know i only tag them with #xian: spice, my oc tags and occasionally #simspice, right? My pinned says im an 18+ blog, my description says 18+ only, how many warnings are expected of me?

next, where and when did i ever interact with anyone, especially from that clique, that made them so uncomfortable? it couldnt be in yoonie's server. i didnt talk about my self or interests and no one ever posted in the nsfw channel of my own server when it existed. so again, it couldnt be there either. I dont even interact with minors on discord or tumblr!

please, please understand that i KNOW there are many many topics people arent comfortable with (i have some too) and theyre 100% valid! especially to block/unfollow me for! Aside from one recent render, I have never posted anything worth a CW (and the render is properly tagged with #cw: implied abuse) and if i do again, it will always have the proper CW. I am not trying to trigger anyone.

If somehow, my pfp, description, etc, is enough to trigger you, please please just stay away from my account for your own sake. and the yarichin argument is weak and only proves the people so uncomfortable and 'triggered' by me apparently still look at my page and saw my current pfp lol

the only post that will be left is the ask i answered showing how harmful corona 'jokes' are towards all asians whether theyre chinese or not

[bridgyrose]

"You might be happier if you didn't turn everything into a fight" Penny and Harriet

“You might be happier if you did not turn everything into a fight!” 

Harriet glared at Penny as the words rang through her mind, her muscles tensing up as she fought herself from rushing into the android. “And what, exactly, do you mean by that?” 

Penny pulled her blades back, offering a hand to Harriet. “I know you are hurting after losing Tortuga, but lashing out like this is not the answer.”

“How would you know how I feel?” Harriet spat out at her. “You’re just an experiment that Ironwood is toying around with! A machine and a weapon! You dont have any feelings, so how would you know what I’m feeling?!” 

“I… I do…” 

Harriet rolled her eyes as she watched Penny retract her blades and used her semblance to slam into the android, scoffing as she watched the body shut down from the damage it took. She pulled out her scroll and sighed. “Someone come pick up the robot for repairs.” 

“You could be a bit easier on it,” Elm said as she walked into the training room. “We’re supposed to be training it, not destroying it.” 

“I went easy on it, not my fault it couldnt keep up.” Harriet put up her exo arms and started to walk to the prep room. “If the general wants her to be the protector of Remnant, then she’ll need to learn that not everyone can be trusted to fight fair.” 

“Is that why you got defensive when she brought up Tortuga?” 

Harriet frowned and stopped in her step, her hands clenched into a tight fist. “She didnt know him.” 

“Did any of us?” Elm asked as she made her way closer. “This is just a job and none of us are close. The new recruit is the only one who seems interested in making friends-” 

“Then what do you call what you’re doing?” 

“I call it being worried about a teammate. If we’re not on the same page-” 

“Being on the same page got Tortuga killed!” Harriet yelled out, her arms shaking in anger as she stopped herself from lashing out. “He… I was supposed to keep him safe, get him out of there before the charges went off and I was too slow!” 

Elm sighed. “You need to let it go. He knew the risks about the dust mine collapsing and he chose to go through with it.” 

“And we should’ve stopped him! I didnt have time to tell him that I loved-” Harriet bit her tongue and stopped the last few words she wanted to say from coming out. She took a breath and turned away from Elm, continuing to walk off. “Get me when our new weapon is ready for another training session. I’m going to get something to eat.” 

“Dont be long. Clover’s going to brief us on our next mission in about an hour.” 

Harriet rolled her eyes and kept walking, taking a few breaths to steady her heart and body as her emotions raged on inside of her. She didnt blame Tortuga, the only way they could clear out the grimm in that mine was to collapse a few tunnels. But she did blame herself for not being fast enough to get him out, for being too slow to outrun the rocks that fell and opened the chasm that swallowed him up. It was her fault Tortuga died, and if General Ironwood was going to have her train Atlas’ new weapon, then she was going to make sure it couldnt fail no matter what was thrown at it.

[thatcaliber]

i've kinda hacked my brain lately into doing a similar thing i call cycling. i have several things I want to do, for example: reading, fucking off on tumblr, watching a show, making art, etc.

previously, i would pick one thing and do it and do it and even when i was tired of it, because that was the thing i had Chosen for that day so i would keep doing it until bedtime or whatever. because i had this like. idea in my mind that if i was only doing something for a short period of time, like if i only embroidered for an hour and therefore didnt make huge progress, it wasn't worth doing. its only worth doing if i made big progress!! big progress gives serotonin...eventually

so then what id end up doing is if i didnt have the energy to do the thing all day, it just didnt get done. if i cant sit and read a book for several hours because my attention span is low, i wont read at all even though i love reading. i didnt read books for years, which made me really sad.

but then i realized that my mindset was kinda silly. reading a chapter or even a few pages of a book a day is objectively better for my brain than not reading books at all because i couldnt get my attention span to last. tossing 20 stitches into my most recent embroidery project is better than letting it rot undone forever. sketching something for fun is fine, it doesnt always have to be a finished piece. and if its gonna be a finished piece, it can take as long as i want! i dont have to do it all today!

so now i cycle activities. i start with, say, tumblr. i scroll tumblr until i feel bored, even just a little. then i put tumblr away and think "what sounds good now?" so i put on a tv show, which i usually combine with something like embroidery or playing games on my phone if its not something that requires my full attention. when im bored of that, or even if the episode ended so it seems like a good time for a change, i stop that and i read for a bit or whatever. as soon as i begin to feel bored of that, or my neck hurts from hunching, or my eyes are tired, or literally any other reason, i cycle to the next activity. and i just do that, over and over again until the day is done or whatever. so instead of dedicating my day to one or two things and getting mad that i couldnt focus, i just. let my brain go where it wants, for as long as it wants instead of fighting it

its made me feel a little bit more like im accomplishing stuff, even if its only a little bit at a time and its made me feel less like im just falling into a low energy hole of scrolling the internet until i want to chop my fingers off. its made me a little less depressed and feel more like im actually DOING my hobbies. im reading more books, i'm making more art, writing more, watching more movies, whatever.

the change in my thoughts that im allowed to do many things for short periods of time instead of picking One Thing i have to do all day even when im tired of it because i Committed to that thing for the day really helped my little autism brain

somehow, amazingly, i have hacked the impulse that makes me mindlessly scroll on my phone. it's not gone but i've paired it with a conscious thought process that goes like, "what's my goal here? i'm looking for entertainment, for information, for something that makes me feel more optimistic and interested in the world i live in..."

and because that kicks in between apps, too, i'm not doomscrolling as much. i'm intentionally seeking out posts or videos or whatever that actually mean something to me. when i'm not satisfied i walk away or pick up a book instead. most subtle yet impactful change i've gone through in years

i did not intentionally set out to change this. i've just been working on my mindset in general. hey, turns out having a good therapist again helps

[pol1gonal]

This is just me ranting a lot about music shit and not in a fun music creation way more in a music distribution way.

For such an artsy profession/hobby it's odd how cold the process of uploading your music is. It's also super annoying and despite being cold its very inefficient!

Today I switched to Distrokid distribution, the reason for this being that my previous distributor Vampr wasnt living up to anything they had previously. When I signed up and pushed out my first 3 releases they were a free reliable option that had good website formatting that was professional and sleek while also being practical. Then in like april I think they sent an email being like "heyyy we're gonna be updating our UI and adding pre save links and you'll be able to payout at any time! :) so we're gonna be down for a bit"

None of these were particularly useful to me specifically but they were nice to have and other people were probably excited. So then I forgot about it until I checked spotify for artists a bit later and photogeniac was just completely gone. So I checked the vampr distribution page and it was also gone there, then I emailed their support email and tldr they lost it and it was completely out of their system and they seemed like they didnt wanna admit it. Like first they were like "we cant find your account" and then when they found it they were like "oh yeah we see your two releases ever, STGSITVP and SFTCE! problem solved youve never released anything else!"

Ultimately it sucked that it was gone on but I didn't really care because photogeniac was the first thing I released and so it sucked and its not like anyone was listening to it anyways. But while I was checking I saw their UI update and it just looked so weird. Like not only was it harder to understand where things were but like it just looked so much more unprofessional. It looked more like "hey man you wanna upload some music and stuff and use our stuff and upload cmon man" and before it was like "hello, upload music here. or don't, its up to you"

So then a bit ago I was gonna release Chumboxxing as a single on streaming and the UI for uploading on vampr was just so weird and bad. Like I'm not just mad cause it was different that shit was just hard to understand. This wasnt the only factor but it was one of the reasons chumboxing is a bandcamp exclusive (for now at least, it will be available as a bonus track on the next album).

A few days ago I saw that SFTCE got changed to an Album instead of an EP. Uh oh! It turns out this wasnt vampr's fault actually, but I didn't know that. So I went to the vampr site and it kept crashing and eventually I managed to get to see that I couldnt change it. So i ended up deciding to bite the bullet and pay money for distrokid (the leading distributor in the industry I believe, doesnt really matter I chose it cause it's the one I'd heard of a bunch and Neil Cic uses it)

And switching distributors of course couldnt be simple, for one vampr is trying to get its last punches in and their website kept crashing (I got like 6 error404s during the whole process). Distrokid while having a much better UI than Vampr has some odd decisions like how when you upload multiple tracks it has them and the release info all in a vertical scrolling thing instead of having pages, and theres gonna be 2 of these releases for a few days.

Also, this isnt a strictly music thing but I'm sick of having to have a real name for shit. I put Poligonal O for my name on the song credits. I have like everything about my real life and my online life very separate and with a few exceptions I really don't want either of those to intersect.

Anyways moral of the story is how come releasing music isnt easier? If you bothered to read all this thats cool you're cool. If you havent read all of it go back and start again you failed. Listen to my music on stuff and things and byyyeee

[syrupspinner]

nextfest demos in the order i played them!

except for 500 calibre contractz since i already talked about that

im not gonna spend too long talking about em, since theyre just demos and all, but! i like talking :3

this was great! ive tried some pinball games in the past, and out of them ive enjoyed demon's tilt the most. the progress system reminds me of mario pinball land, where if you fall down youve gotta work back up. it was kinda frustrating in that game, but i trust that this will work to make improvements like the checkpoint system. also, i like the abilities! it reminds me of wizorb in the way that i dont enjoy arkanoid/break-out by itself, and the magic lets you avoid stalemates and give the levels more freedom. so yeah, looking forward to the full game!

windows firewall defender moment. sorry, but im not really feeling this one. i couldnt progress after building the chocolate crafting table. im not sure if i was missing something or if the game just wasnt showing me new recipes. the menu sais thered be more pages if i scrolled, but there wasnt. also, i killed a ginger bread guy, but like... nothing happened? it didnt give me anything but the body just stayed there. next.

a little rough around the edges, but i respect the niche! i won my first match through attrition, but i can see myself really latching on to the gameplay if i gave the full game a shot. definitely one of those games that you leave lying around your library and launch when youre in the mood, not the kinda thing you focus on and grind out.

first impression, this needs better controller support, sometimes the menu just... doesnt work without a mouse, including the title screen. ive got a bit of a soft spot for marble games, i was inspired when i saw patricia taxxons marble blast video. but a lot of them just seem a bit unpolished, Sphero included. the foundation is there, i think the controls are pretty alright, but the presentation loses me

typo in the tutorial. the game was really polite about being a work in progress, so ill let it slide. especially since this was made by three people, wow? anyway, im kinda surprised by how well i jived with this game. i was expecting this to be a kinda mid ecchi game, but its actually surprisingly fun. the weird thing is, i remember trying viscera cleanup detail when i was younger and really not liking it. maybe this is more engaging because of the setting and style? either way, wishlisted. wish i had people to try the multiplayer with!

oh my god its so small. ew, up to jump?oh never mind this game is funky /pos as hell. i dig the music, and the npcs have such killer personality. the core mechanics are a bit simplistic but im hoping the full game fleshes them out more. i feel kinda bad that i dont have much else to say about this, the gameplay's pretty straightforward but the art direction saves it. wishlisted

last one for the night. full disclosure, i held off on this one because i knew id be into it anyway, but MAN thats a understatement! im so so into the combat here, i love being able to plan things out before committing to them, and its SO fun to play with the AP system! the writing is super fun, i already love all these characters, and i cant wait for a second to see where the story's going with the memory loss and the weird teacher, ugh i wanna play more! bar none my favorite game so far

tune in whenever my adult responsibilities are slightly less worrisome for the second part! homefully itll be the conclusion, im planning for it to be but oooooo viddy games...

[narmisseite]

Megumi Dated his

Teacher Online ...

Character : Megumi Fushiguro

Reader : Female (sub)

Plot : Its the first year in college and you find out that Megumi is the class president. (Story contains a plot twist)

Its was a cool breezy morning as you headed to your college . Dressed up in formal pastel narrow skirt and blouse on top. You were a new junior teacher at college. You entered the class while adjusting your glasses . You greeted the class as you sat down. As you were new to the class you asked the students to introduce themselves. "Nice meeting you all i hope you all do well but before we get started may know who is the class president ?" You question busy flipping the pages of your book. "Megumi Fushiguro" a silent but serious voice hits your ears as you look up at the person. You were awestruck at his beauty and his name. "Oh ok megumi nice to meet you too !" You greet him with a warm smile but he ignores it as he sits down. You thought to yourself "What a cold person this fellow is...' . You start the class as it was your Biology session. "Ok class you copy this in your notes in exact 5 minutes kay". You sit down and sigh as your feet hurt from the heels. As usual you text the guy. The guy you found on a dating website. You had been talking to him since weeks but havent seen his face yet .To be honest you loved him cause he was very romantic and kinky at the same time. U text him 'hi' but u didnt recieve any reply. You tried it again but he seemed to be busy. You kept you phone aside and went around to check the students work . Suddenly you see the class president checking his phone under the desk . You were surprised as to how can a class president be so irresponsible. You overlooked his mistake. The bell rings " ok class please complete the given assignments and revise your work for the next class have a great day !". You cheer them up as it was the last class for the day and the could go home . But your mind kept thinking bout the boy with the phone and you didnt want such behaviour in the class so you decided to confront the person and explain him tht he is wrong. "Uhh whats his name .... ha ! Megumi the class presidebt can you please wait behind i wantdd to talk to you." Megumi was a patient guy he nodded his head and sat down on his table scrolling through his phone waiting for the others to leave. When everyone exited the classroom you walked up towards the cold student and said " So president i have seen you checking your phone often during my class is there any special reason for it ? ". You thought he would stutter and get nervous but to your surprise he was rather calm and content as he spoke justifying himself that he wasnt doing a bad thing " Ma'am i was going through something very important at that particular moment and so i couldnt resist but going through my phone during class. " "And what is this important thing may i know megumi ?" You asked him i a sarcasticalky annoying way. You surprised at his rude behaviour as to which he didnt even apologize " Well you know that using your mobile phones during class is not allowed here so ..." . "Ma'am i do know the rules but i am sorry i cannot let you know what i was checking in my phone". Megumi replies almost accepting his mistake. "I will forgive you only if you give me your phone to check what important work were you going through earlier." Megumi sighed in relief and instead of agruing further he handed you the phone with he texts screen on display. You were shocked to see . You couldnt believe your eyes. It had you username on it and megumi's username was the guy your were talking to . Am i dating with this guy online ?!?! "Omg you are meshiro@213 but hiw !!! " You shouted out your inner feelings to which megumi was also shocked at c What ? Ma'am what do mean 'you are'? Do you know ny username ?"

The part 2 is here

Megumi dated his teacher online 😄🤗🍀

[kaz11283]

“Shh. He’s forming an artistic opinion” from the prompt list sounds fun!

Characters: Loki, you, avengers, Thor

(All relations are platonic)

Warning: None, slight swearing

Summary: Bored with nothing to do you decide to go bother your favorite Asguardian who just wants some peace and quite.

Loki Masterlist

~~~~~

Shhhh, Hes Forming an Artistic Opinion

You had been laying in your room, scrolling through Tictok, YouTube, and Facebook. Yhere was nothing to do, absolutly nothing, it was as if the bad guys had decided to take off for the summer. Everyone was getting restless around the compound. You could do anything you wanted from watch a movie in the theater room yo throw things at moving targets but you had already done all of that multiple times.

"JARVIS," you called from youe bed.

"Yes ma'am?" Even the AI system sounded bored.

"Is there possibly anything going on somewhere in the place?"

"Thor and Steve are training, Nat, Clint, and Bucky are watching a movie, and Tony is trying to get Bruce to turn into the Hulk. I would advise staying away from the lab though Miss y/n. And Loki is sitting in the living room."

"Ah yes, my favorite god to screw with. Thank you JARVIS." You said swinging your legs from the bed and padding out your door.

Down in the living room Loki was sitting with his legs propped on the table reading a book you couldn't pronounce. When you sat down he looked over at you.

"May I help you?" He asked coolly closing the book but keeping his finger bookmarking his spot.

"Whatcha reading Mischief?" You aaked crossing your legs under you.

"A book, although I doubt you would know what that is." He saod flatly, ok so you didnt have the best relationship with the god but you couldnt help that you were sometimes better at pranking the god than anyone ever has been.

"Thats not fair, I went to school, college even. I have a higher GPA than most of the people in here besides Bruce and Tony, give a girl a break." You rolled your eyes.

"Ok, fine, I'm reading the history of Asguard, of course not the recent history, but before my time." He proped the book back open.

"Lame. You wanna go train?"

"No."

"Watch a movie?"

"No."

"Swim?"

"Nope." He popped the p.

"Go to the mall?"

"Thats a definite no." He turned the page. "Isn't there someone else that you could possibly bother."

"Oh come on, you know your my favorite to bother." You laughed.

"Fine, sit here."

"Fine, I will. You know your a real spoil sport. Your not making this fun at all." You fell back aginst the couch with a huff.

"Darling your the one that came to bother me. You should be greatful that I'm letting you sot here."

"Ha, as if. Your just mad because I can one up you unlike anyone else has." You laughed nudging his shoulder.

"Whatever you want to believe."

"I have and you even know it." You grined.

"Those where adolescent tricks. None that I would be proud to admit we're mine. I can easily get you back I just choose not to."

"You have tried, you have also failed. You forget I was raised with two horrible older brothers, i know where to look and how to know somethings been messed with." You wink at him.

"I have yet to even think about paying you back." He then closed the book and sat it on the table looking at you now.

"You've tried. The Nair in the shampoo, I smelled it before I even lathered it; spider hanging from my closet, come on I fight bad guys for a living; itching powder in my underwear, that was close but you left some of the powder on top of the drawer you really need to clean up aftet your self; and lets not forget about the dye in the conditioner, I really liked bekng a red head but Nat is the only one that can pull it off." You shrugged. He stared at you trying to figure you out when Thor and Steve walked in.

"Ah Lady y/n, I just beat the cap in a sparring match would you like to join me next?" Thor smiled at you.

"Whats Loki staring at?" Steve asked.

"Shhhh, hes trying to form an artistic opinion on how I keep figuring out his tricks." You laughed.

Loki rolled his eyes looking at you. "The only thing I can conclude my dear midguardian is that we should join together and team up."

"Hey! I actually like that idea. I need a few new tricks up my sleeve." Thor and Steve groaned from across the room. "Alright you figure out sime stuff, I'm gonna go train with Thor for a bit. We'll meet back here after lunch."

He smiled that trickster smile at you. "That sounds like a wonderful idea darling."

~~~~

Tag list:

@kgirardin

@sophlubbwriting

@supbeeches

[bl1ndbraavosi]

Stalking you bc I haven’t been able to be on tumblr lately. Seeing those prompts from earlier today and give me number 37 pls, dealers choice 🥰

hehe hi ty this is way longer than i anticipated but I COULDNT STOP so pls accept #1 Most Terrible Babysitter Rokudaime Hokage (under the cut bc she is kinda long for tumblr)

37. "What happened to their happily ever after?" "Not all those love stories get a happily ever after, sometimes it's just once upon a time"

-

There was something to be said about the fact that his most gifted medic was, for all intents and purposes, a single mother to a very precocious child. Sarada was the spitting image of Sasuke, but everything in her countenance screamed Sakura. He never knew a child to be so shrewd. Well, aside from himself, anyway.

Under normal circumstances, he wouldn’t have gotten involved. But, these circumstances were anything but normal; Sakura was his former pupil-become-friend. Sort of. He couldn’t very well demand her presence at the hospital and leave her young daughter to her own devices within the Uchiha compound.

No, instead, he’d demanded that one of the other parent-type shinobi take on the littlest Uchiha for the night. They had all adamantly refused, and now he understood why.

Sarada peered at him over her red-rimmed glasses, strapped to her little head with a thick rubber band, but all the ridiculous spectacles in the world could not diminish the dark eyes narrowed at him in suspicion as he paraphrased and skipped over entire sections in the bedtime story he was meant to be reading her.

“That’s not how it goes,” she said for the fifth time in the last five minutes.

“If you already know how it goes, why am I reading it?” he challenged. Her eyes narrowed further.

“Because I’m five and my mama said you have to,” she said.

“You know, she really takes orders from me? I’m her boss,” he pointed out, not entirely sure what he expected this five-year-old to do about it.

“Mama doesn’t take orders from anyone,” she said with a proud smile, like Sakura had trained her to say it. He wouldn’t have been surprised if she had done just that. He slumped over in the tiny wooden chair that was definitely not built for a grown man.

“Alright, kid, I’m gonna level with you; I’m not cut out for this bedtime story thing.”

“You’re telling me,” she said with a little scoff, popping her arms out from under her blankets to take the book from his lap. She flipped through the pages, skimming over all of them until one of them pleased her. “These aren’t my favourites, anyway,” she admitted. “My favourite is when mama tells me different stories. Without reading,” she said, her dark eyes big and imploring.

“You want me to make it up?” he asked doubtfully. Her cheeks went a little pink.

“Did you…know my dad?” she asked timidly. Kakashi got the feeling Sakura was not one to entertain this request very often, if Sarada’s shifty eyes and pink cheeks were anything to go by. “Could you tell me about him? And mama?”

“No way,” he said, knowing Sakura was probably going to give him shit for it later. But, right now, his main concern was that he was sat on a chair built for a toddler, and his legs were quickly going numb. At this rate, he would have to ask the ANBU guards stationed outside this house to carry him home. “I’ll tell you something better,” he promised.

Mollified, Sarada tucked herself lower into her bed, staring up at him impatiently. He launched into the story of her parents without telling her it was about them.

Sasuke and Sakura; where to begin. He supposed the beginning would do. So he started her off with their beginnings as he knew them; the genin team, where Sakura had been the brightest by far, but often overshadowed. Sarada, an academy student herself, was deeply invested in the details of Team Seven’s early days. Before he knew it, she was yawning uncontrollably and those dark eyes were falling shut despite all her efforts.

He made himself a tea and sat on the big couch in their house until Sakura came slumping in after a long night at the hospital. She was surprised to see him there, thanking him profusely before pouring herself into her own bed.

-

The next time it happened, he hadn’t even bothered asking anyone else to look after Sarada, even though he promised Sakura he would. Now that he knew how to get the little demon to conk out quickly, it would be a walk in the park. Besides, Sakura had bragged to just about everyone that Sarada apparently loved him, and wouldn’t stop talking about him. He just hoped the girl kept their story to herself.

She didn’t even bother with a book this time; she just laid on her pillow and stared up at him until he began. The story took an unpleasant turn here, and he was worried about telling her all the hardships her parents had faced as children. He shouldn’t have been; this was a reality of the shinobi world, a world that Sarada was a part of. Still, he tried to handle Sasuke’s running away and various attempts at killing Naruto and Sakura as delicately as possible.

“Didn’t he love them?” Sarada asked, looking sad.

“Yes, he did,” Kakashi said with absolute certainty. “But sometimes that’s not enough,” he finished.

“You shouldn’t leave people you love,” Sarada said adamantly, and Kakashi realized that perhaps this was not the version of this story to be telling her. Thankfully, she drifted off shortly thereafter.

It was a while before his storytelling was put to the test again, but it seemed no time had passed at all for Sarada. She was as deeply invested in the story as ever, bursting with questions and ready to hear more.

He jumped right into it; talking about a formidable clan, a noble and strong clan, and Sasuke’s dedication to that clan. He skipped over the nastier intricacies—like the slaughter and fratricide—and focusing in on the devotion Team Seven had for one another. Sarada didn’t seem overly suspicious of his sugar-coating, and allowed him to continue on uninterrupted. 

“Why did they keep fighting so hard to save someone who didn’t want to be saved?” she asked, a little knot appearing above her brows, just as Sakura’s did when she worried.

“That’s what you do for family,” he explained. “You stick by them, no matter what.” Her knotted brow eased slightly.

The next story time brought them to the war; the rejoining of forces, Sasuke’s return to Konoha’s side, fighting alongside his remaining family, and saving the world. Sarada seemed a little more appeased by this part of the story, taking particular interest in hearing about Sakura’s healing prowess on the battlefield.

“She saved all those lives?” she asked with wide eyes.

“Yes, but let’s not forget it was a team effort. The leader also saved many lives,” he said, the leader being him. She didn’t particularly care. He wondered if Sakura had actively instilled her general disregard for him as a leader in her daughter, or if this behaviour was hereditary.

The only thing more impressive than Sakura keeping Naruto’s heart pumping by shoving her hand into his body was the fact that she had punched a goddess in the face.

“And then she saved her other team members? After all that?” she asked, her eyes wide. Kakashi realized belatedly that he had meant to tell her a small romance about her parents, but instead had exalted her mother for the better part of it all. He supposed that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. Perhaps Sakura wouldn’t be so mad at him, should she find out.

But, of course, impudent as she was, Sarada made it clear that he would likely never be safe from Sakura’s wrath.

“So, they went through all that to save him, but he still left,” she said, a deep line appearing between her brows.

“He left to protect them,” Kakashi explained. Sarada did not look convinced.

 “He didn’t leave for her,” Sarada said, rolling her eyes behind those thick red frames. “Does he come back?”

“Yes, eventually,” Kakashi said, feeling uneasy. “But he leaves again because he thinks it’s the right thing to do.”

“He’s wrong,” Sarada said. “I’m five and I know that. What happened to their happily ever after?” she complained. Kakashi had forgotten among all her quips and questions that she really was just a five-year-old girl.

“Not all those love stories get a happily ever after. Sometimes it's just once upon a time.”

“This story sucks, Hokage-sama,” she complained.

He found himself agreeing. He had always kept his reservations about Sasuke’s absence to himself, but it was hard to deny that his daughter certainly seemed to have a better understanding of duty than he did currently.

“Do you think my dad will come back?” she asked suddenly. “Do you think he loves us?”

“I’m sure of it,” he answered as quickly as his mouth would let him speak.

“But he’s not here now,” she said, her eyelids slowly getting heavier and her words slurring with sleepiness. “I’m glad you’re here, Hokage-sama.”

“Me too, kid.”

“Does that mean we’re family?” she asked softly. He didn’t know what to say.

“I guess it does.” And just like that, she was out.

-

“Hey, Kakashi?” Sakura poked her head into his office, her brow knotted and eyes narrowed at him.

“Hm?” he answered, barely sparing her a glance as he reviewed his pile of mission scrolls.

“Just a quick question for you,” she said, her voice dripping in suspicion. He felt his shoulders tense. “Why the fuck does my daughter keep telling people you’re her dad?”

[tsukishitstain]

series m.list || part five - bearer of bad news

*reminder that tsukishima’s screenshots are the ones in light mode!!

tsukishima x reader smau

*timeskip to wednesday*

Each time the welcoming bells chimed to alert employees that a newcomer had walked through the doors of the shop, your head instinctively would jerk up to see if a familiar face was present. you decided to ignore the anxiety that was bubbling inside your stomach as you sat and waited for Yumiko to show up. ‘i’ll be sure to take a pic with her when she gets here, my instagram feed looks a bit bland,’ you thought to yourself, mindlessly scrolling through social media to cure your boredom.

“Y/n, i’m so sorry i’m late, i got caught up talking to one of my professors after class. my schedule has been so hectic lately but i’m glad we were able to make time to meet with each other and catch up.” Her smile was bright despite looking disheveled from rushing to the shop you assumed.

“It’s fine no need to apologize~” suddenly you were reminded why you and yumiko clicked. there was a certain charismatic atmosphere that surrounded her. one that made you forget all the wrong doings in the world. “Plus i wasn’t even waiting here that long, i’ve only been here for like maybe six or seven minutes.”

She toyed with the plastic menu in front of her as her eyes skipped around, attempting to find an item that seemed appealing enough to satisfy her. “What should i get? i’m thinking either a classic tapioca milk tea or a manga slush with boba,” she paused for a slight second before she continued, “oh crap i forgot my wallet in my purse at home, do you mind covering for me?”

“Yeah i don’t mind,” it really didn’t bother you; people forget things all the time and you were no stranger to making mistakes. “also i heard the taro milk tea was really good here so i think i’m gonna go with that.” The two of you placed your orders and returned to your previous seats, drinks in hand. “Yumi-chan, lets take pictures so i can post them on instagram! my feed has been looking so boring lately and i haven’t posted in a while,” you rambled on as she agreed to take the picture and began to talk about how she also needed to post new pictures to her page. “Those turned out so cute, what should i caption it? I think i’m gonna go with something like ‘boba with the bestest person in the world’ or does that sound weird?”

“y/n...as much as i would love to sit here and talk about instagram captions, i really do have something important to tell you...”

----------------

previous || next

a/n: i feel like such a disappointment it took me 6 days to get the energy to write this and it’s not even that good😔i planned your post a new part every 2 days but with how hectic my school schedule is idk how often i’ll be able to post🥺🥺i’m gonna update this as much as possible tho like i really am gonna try my best😔💞

taglist~

to be added to or removed from the taglist either comment, shoot me an ask, or message me <3

a strike through your username means I couldnt tag you for some reason :((

@beastboypng @thatonee @jeez-niki @galagcica @idiot-juice-enthusiast @resetrestartandreplay @animeanxiety @differentballooncollection @itsalyssa15 @therestless101 @kageyamasbabygorl @rileystebbs @bakibakini @nefelithetrashcan @cactuski6 @pantasticalcat

[over-grown-emo-kid]

Shift attempt #4

I wanted to try a completely different method, more adapted to someone with adhd. I mixed some ideas from these two blog posts on amino (https://aminoapps.com/c/desired/page/blog/adhd-shifting-realities/bKn3_8EUouBV5J3Mlxl4NeJYRzBkxbgxL7 and https://aminoapps.com/c/realityshifting/page/blog/i-have-adhd-heres-my-method/wKKN_x61iouJqpDZe4r1bEl8VBrgVz2r2WD). I made a shifting video que to try out but I am switching the second video so I’ll list the updated playlist here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=inpok4MKVLM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-O7WkcyBGU

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cj-AL-J98U0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TaAUHw6kPlk

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dz_7guYo4tA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4FUE0SyP0lo

Here’s were I will talk about the more specific details of my set up (I practice witchcraft so I set things up in line with my practice and treat it like castings a spell so it’s a little long winded), if you want to just read how I felt about this attempt scroll down to the tldr. 

After reading those two blogs and set up my video que I grabbed my UA mug and set my kettle to boil so I can set everything else up. I put my journal and pen on my bed, where I plan to shift, and place a single bay leaf and an amethyst on my journal. For the tea blend I grab one tea bad of my kava kava blend and mix 1.5 teaspoons of dried mugwort, 3 small pinches of chamomille, and 3 small pinches of dried pink rose petals and some honey. 

WARNINGS FOR THIS TEA: Mugwort does have abortative properties so I wouldn’t drink it if you suspect you’re pregnant and want to be. Also it was stronger than I expected, I was two three sips in and I was in like the early trance-like state of meditation. I was not expecting it and kind of over corrected so I could focus on scripting, which messed me up.

Anyways, while I left the tea to brew for ten minutes I cleansed my shifting space with my mountain sage bundle while repeating my affirmations (I used the affirmations from the second blog). Focusing on my journal put getting everything from my laptop to my pillow to my head phones. I brought some extra candles to the alter next to me bed (which already has two candles on it). Specifically the one that’s scent is based off of Dabi and one that smells kind of similar (like a smoky sandalwood type scent). I cleanse them before lighting them and then return to my tea. I stir three times repeating my affirmations and leave it next to my bed to cool. I burn the bay leaf over the amethyst and journal, rubbing the ashes into my hands. Once the tea is cooled I light my incense of choice (it’s called “booty call” I get it in bulk from a local hippie store (not the metaphysical store I go to like literally it’s a Grateful Dead deadhead store) and it smells like strawberries) with the Dabi candle. I start drinking the tea as a script. Repeating my affirmations periodically and blowing out the candles before drinking the last sip (because of the fire hazard, I have a cat). 

I may or may not post my script, which is really similar each time but not today. 

Anyways TLDR: I really liked the tea blend, it almost immediately put me into a trance like state. Next time I will finish scripting before drinking the tea. I got way too caught up in one of the meditations that I replaced in the playlist above and I ended up obsessing over the set up in my head while trying to relax. I didn’t have an many symptoms as normal, but putting the amethyst on my forehead while attempting made my entire head fussy and it still is (sorry for any grammar or spelling mistakes). I liked the visualization exercise of the ball. I actually had a much easier time with the 1st person visualization and when I looked in the mirror I actually looked like what I scripted, 2D and everything. I just couldnt get past that. Good progress in my opinion.